Numbers

Numbers from this week:

2,000 + words written

1000 + miles traveled

200 pages read

60 miles run

54 hours of sleep

12 cups of coffee

8 xc practices

3 loads of laundry (dirty running clothes for days)

1 cross country race

After a whirlwind two-day trip to Spokane for a cross-country race and hours spent toiling over Aristotle, I’m officially exhausted.
It has been a great weekend for sure, 

but I'm still processing everything. 

Exactly what happened during that second mile that
made me lose my strong mindset? 

Why did I feel so much less confident than my race the week before? 

How am I supposed to be a leader on my team if I can’t push past the mental barriers that have been plaguing me for my entire college career? 

How did these last four years go so quickly…
and how is it that I’m already a senior? 

And what exactly does Aristotle think about the 
teleological explanations of human existence anyway?

My mind is full.
Which means I should probably just go to bed and rest before morning practice. 

But a quick note about this weekend. 

My grandmother, who is the absolute most incredible human I know, came to watch me race. She has come to this course to watch me for the last four seasons, and each year we have gotten a picture. I cannot express how grateful I am to have such an amazing support in my life. 

Two different jerseys and three years passed. 

On that note, it's time to get ready for another week. 

“On ne voit bien qu’avec le cœur. L’essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.”

- Le Petit Prince 

Bonne nuit!!! 

And Cross Country Begins!

I'm feeling all kinds of sentimental tonight. Today was my last, first cross country race ever. The first race of my senior year of college. And even though I have an entire year's worth of running ahead of me, I am increasingly aware that I need to cling tightly to every moment. 

It is wild to think that, when I started this blog, my collegiate running career was nothing more than a dream in the distance. I was living in the 6e in Paris and running through the French countryside every morning in the hopes of becoming fast enough to get a scholarship on my return to the United States. As I write this, I realize how silly it must seem to many people that I was thinking about cross country while I was living in a city that most people only ever dream about, but I suppose it shows 

just how passionate I am about this sport. 

I love my team. 

I love bonding over ice baths and long runs and very challenging workouts. 

I love racing. Though I admittedly do much better in workouts than in races, 

I am working on getting the mentality down and becoming more competitive. 

I love that I have the opportunity every day to work 

on bettering myself and growing personally. 

I have learned so much about identity and my weaknesses and strengths.

 And I love that I get to be a leader and encourager on my team. 

Basically, I feel so incredibly blessed. 

I am so grateful for this season of my life. 

So my first race today. The first of many. I am pleased with it, but I still have much improvement to do and big goals to work toward. I am stronger than ever this year due to a summer of heavy lifting, quality seventy mile weeks, 

lots of healthy calories and a lot of stretching and plymo. 

Far from being the end, this is just the beginning. I'm ready.  

Since I Last Stopped By...

The last time I posted, it was Christmas break. 

Now it is almost the end of February. 

There is no possible way that I could ever attempt to summarize the beautiful, stretching, and sometimes  difficult experiences I have had in the last month and a half, and I am not going to try. 

I will simply say that life has been rich and challenging and wonderful. 

Indoor Track Season officially came to a close this weekend with the GNAC championships. The season was fast and somewhat anti-clamactic, but I have developed a love for indoor track and am sad to see the season end. There is something just plain wonderful about being able to run inside when there is snow on the ground. With outdoor season now in session, I have many freezing workouts ahead of me and likely a race or two in blizzard conditions. 

But I'm mostly just sad to see another season slip away. I am becoming increasingly aware of my eligibility winding down, and though I am still a junior, I feel like I am running out of time to achieve my goals. 

More on that later. 

I competed in the 5k and 3k this weekend, and they were both decent races. Nothing phenomenal, by any means. And I didn't PR. But I did engage. And I was mentally positive. And with my track record (no pun intended) of incredibly negative self-talk during races, I am pleased with my mental progress. 

And I'm incredibly proud of my team. We pulled out two third-place spots in our conference, which is the best my school has done in a long time. 

We have some incredible athletes on our team, 

and I am grateful to be able to claim them as teammates. 

So, the 500 plus miles I have logged since December... well, they seem kind of pointless with indoor season gone and no hope for nationals in the near future. But I have to keep working hard and dreaming big. The small things will pay off eventually. I have to believe that. I won't run out of time. I just have to be happy with the small victories and keep inching my way forward. 

School has been overwhelming lately, but I am loving every minute of it. I literally cannot explain how much I love to learn. I am fascinated by every class I am taking right now... Geeking out on Biblical linguistics in New Testament Interpretation, soaking in different cultural practices in Intercultural Communication, discovering new elements of communication in Nonverbal, and learning the essence of the First Amendment in Media Law. I'm a perfectionist and have spent way more time on these classes than I should. But I am so grateful to be able to be a student right now. This is a good season. 

I have so many things to say, and this post has been quite a mess. But the most important thing that I want to convey is how incredibly blessed I feel. Though things are messy and difficult and stressful at times... though I sometimes feel like a failure or am disappointed in my performances... 

these feelings are overwhelmed with the love of God abounding in my life 

and the joy I experience in the community I have. 

I have never, in my entire life, known so many inspirational and kind people. I feel like I am constantly surrounded by world-changers. And I am seriously having so much fun. Despite not having much "free time" I am enjoying the things I do so much and wouldn't change a thing. 

I think that is all for now. Things should slow down the next two weeks, and I will hopefully have time to write some really insightful, philosophical stuff about how time is abstract and actually doesn't exist :) 

Or maybe just my thoughts on the Winter Olympics and social media. 

Mais pour maintenant, au revoir!!! 

Running Rambles

This morning I headed out the door for 

13 solitary miles along a snowy, country road. 

It was freezing and serene and lonely in a beautiful, romantic sort of way. My hips were slightly sore by the end, and I looked forward to sitting by the fire and eating everything I could get my hands on, but the thing is - I could have kept going. When you run for that long, it feels strange to stop. 

Anyway, I feel accomplished and thrilled that I checked off yet another day of my Christmas break running/training schedule. I have been so incredibly motivated the past month. I haven't missed a day of training, and I have neatly written down each day's mileage and accomplishments on a piece of paper that I have tucked neatly into the training binder our coaches made for us. 

And the thing is, I am really enjoying it. Though I definitely have days where the last thing I want to do is run a tempo in the freezing rain, I have a big goal in mind - and I'm wiling to sacrifice for it. 

This is intrinsic motivation at its finest. I don't have a coach watching me or people to impress. I am alone with my thoughts. My feet drag along the pavement for the first few miles, stubbornly screaming at me to slow down or turn around and go home. But then, they quiet. I can hear my breath, I can feel the icy breeze and my numbing hands, and I get into a rhythm. 

I haven't felt this way about running since I started my college career. Since the year I spent in Paris. Since I used to run by myself through the small French villages and smile at people as I passed them (They all looked appalled that I was running and not biking. Outside of Paris, running is not all that popular). 

During those nine months, I ran for me. And I ran because I had a big dream ahead. I wanted to be a collegiate athlete. I wanted it so badly. It is so important to have goals. And so I sacrificed. 

And I made it, and my motivation changed. I began to run to make my coach proud. I ran to impress my friends. I ran to beat my teammates. And slowly, the joy of running and competition seeped out of my heart. It became a job laden with pressure. It became a routine and I dreaded it. 

I was fearful of losing because I put my identity into my performance as an athlete. 

But lately everything has been different. I have been running for me again. And I have been running with a grateful heart, each day thankful that I am not injured (like I was last year at this time) and that I have the opportunity to be a collegiate runner. And I haven't been placing my identity in running or worried or stressed about missing a day - I have fully given it to God. So, I don't feel burnt out or heavy. I feel light on my feet.

I honestly was not too excited to face those icy, lonely miles alone this morning. But they were so worth it.

And I am so excited to see what is in store for me this track season. 

One week left of Christmas break, and then it is back to practice, school, and track meets!  

Noel, Noel...

How on earth is it already Christmas? 

Somehow - in the midst of ten-page APA research papers, finals week, and freezing cold temperatures, and my first indoor track meet -
Christmas kind of snuck up on me. 

And while I am usually obsessed with all things Christmas,

 I have felt more reflective than festive the last few days. 

I have been reminiscing on this time last year. I was so very different. My goals, my understanding of the world, my fears, my concerns.... they all feel so distant. I almost feel like that person wasn't me. 

Like she is just some character from a novel that I once read. 

It is a strange sensation, and it is one that I have often felt as I have grown and changed over the years. Three years ago at this time I was a lonely American girl wandering around Europe. 

That seems like a dream. Did that even happen?

And I have been contemplating the future. I have so many big dreams that do not in any way resemble a normal life. I have big fears, too. Fears of settling. Fears of failing. Fears of getting stuck in piles on school debt and having to work a 9-5 job that I hate and of not being happy. But mostly I am not afraid. Mostly I am excited and curious as to how my life is going to unfold. 

I want to know what is waiting around the corner. 

So all of these thoughts have been swirling around in my mind, and I suppose it is because I finally have time to think thoughts that don't have to do with Organizational Communication or Inferential Statistics. Christmas break is a great time to reflect and to re-assess and to contemplate. 

But it is also a time for celebration.

For Christmas parties. 

For catching up on good books. 

And for spending time with lovely friends. 

And of course - Christmas break is a time for running. Even in the snow and cold. I will be training hard this break. Running everyday, lifting every other day, and swimming two or three days a week. Indoor season is short and fast. And I don't want to miss out on any opportunities because of a lack of preparation. I am so grateful that I am healthy and able to run, as well, because last year at this time I was dealing with a nasty achilles injury that put me out for over a month.

................

Anyway, to get Christmas break started right and to get into the Christmas spirit, my sister and I did some Christmas shopping today (its about time I got on that) and did some holiday baking tonight. And it was lovely. [I am aware how silly it is to parallel Christmas spirit with consumerism and sugary treats, but that is another topic for another blogpost.]
For now, I will just say goodnight :)

Skip-Along!

Today was just the second day back from our week long running break, and I accidentally went on a fifty minute steady/tempo run. I wanted to run a little faster, so I went with some of the guys on my team and a super fast redshirt girl (who didn't take a break). We flew pretty much the whole time, and while I loved the feeling, my body is completely exhausted now. 

I'm still trying to let go of a little (okay a lot) of mental baggage from the season, but I'm ready to tackle indoor season. 

I just need to take one day at a time. 

And I probably need to be careful not to overdo it my first week back :) 

This weekend I went out with friends for a much needed girls' night. After writing two papers and feeling like I had way too much energy because I didn't work out all week, it was so nice to catch up with old friends over kale salad and appetizers at a trendy downtown lounge. 

Classy, classy 

Yesterday my team had a Christmas party. We haven't even gotten through Thanksgiving, you say? Well I say it's never too early for some Christmas cheer. Since everyone will be going home for Christmas, and since this was the day that worked for my coaches to have us over, we brought out the holiday spirit a little early. It's not like the Hallmark channel hasn't been playing Christmas movies all week anyway. We wore ugly sweaters and did white elephants and had mini pumpkin pies to pay tribute to the turkey day holiday we skipped over. It was so wonderful, and I sat there thinking how blessed I am to be part of such an amazing team. 

LOVE this girl! 

That's all for tonight! 

Running Forward

I can hardly believe that October is nearly over. The large trees on my campus have taken on brilliant hues of burgundy and orange and gold. Each morning greets me with a slight frost, and the scent of winter lingers in the air. Seasonal coffee beverages are trendy as ever, and pumpkins are everywhere. 

It sounds lovely, right?

But somehow I am still lost in summer. I am clinging to the rays of warm sunshine and the lazy afternoons. Without me quite realizing it, 

time has gotten away from me.

I am already at midterms. 

And I am already nearly done with my junior season of cross-country.

While I feel satisfied with my work so far academically, 

it is the near end of my cross-country season that worries me.

The thing is, I do not feel like I have accomplished much of anything yet. I have had some great practices. I have run up to sixteen miles in a day. I have developed speed on the track. I have gotten stronger in the weight room. I have even had some decent races. And yet, I have yet to accomplish a single race goal I have set this season. 

And I don’t feel like I have had much opportunity to do it.

Perhaps that is why I treasure cross-country season so much.

 Compared to track, it is incredibly short.

This upcoming weekend is our conference meet. 

It is the first 6k I will have ever run competitively, 

but I am told that the extra 1000 meters makes little difference. 

I am a 10k runner on the track, so I am not too worried about the distance.

We ran our last 5k this past weekend, and I think it was a good way to finish up the regular season. Almost everyone on my team ran their lifetime best times… and though I didn’t quite do that, 

I came the closest I have come to 

my freshman year PRs that I have in two years.

I have such high expectations for myself and know that I am capable of blowing those times out of the water… but the reality is, I have to take one step at a time. I have to be happy with myself for running a season best time and finally dropping down into my freshman year times.

 So I am going to take the positives and move straight ahead to conference.

For those of you who don’t understand what I’m talking about or know my running journey, it is pretty well documented on this blog. 

I am not interested in the past right now, however. 

I am interested in moving forward.

I am stronger and fit than I have ever been. I have put in miles and miles of summer training. I have iced and stretched and went to bed early when everyone else was out having fun. I have dedicated so much to this sport, but none of that matters if I don’t perform on race day. So what’s holding me back?

This weekend, I plan on breaking out of the weird slump that I have been in the past two years. I feel like I did a pretty good job this last Saturday,

 but I know that there is more I can dig out. 

Regardless, however, I refuse to allow negative emotions to dictate my attitude or my running. I am grateful for what I have been able to accomplish this season. I am grateful for being healthy. I am grateful for the progress I have made. And I am grateful that I even get the opportunity to compete. 

I am so blessed, and I am so excited to see what's in store. 

Play

I have two weeks left of school. Not even two. A week and a half. 

But I already feel like it's summer. 

The weather is perfect, the majority of my friends are done with school, and track is over. I feel completely unmotivated to do anything but lay out in the sun, have bonfires, and eat ice cream. 

And go camping. I definitely want to go camping. 

My head is swimming with glorious thoughts of summer, 

and I am so excited to play. 

Lately

I don't know if I'm just overdosing on Vitamin D or what (all this sunshine!!!), but I could not have been happier lately. Summer is slowly showing its face, and a mixture of nostalgia and excitement is coming with it. 

This school year is winding down. As I am getting ready to transfer and move on from this college, I cannot help but reflect on the last two years that I have spent here and all of the things that I have learned. I'm so grateful. It hasn't always been easy, but I wouldn't trade these last two years. 

Lately I have realized how much I'm going to miss my track friends. 

They have all become so dear to me - 

there is nothing like grueling workouts to bring people together! 

Lately I have realized how much God's hand 

has been on my relationships here.

Yesterday I had a Bible study over coffee with a dear friend. I left feeling so blessed - so blessed that God has set up that relationship for both of our benefit. I didn't always have friends I could relate to in that way here (though I have had wonderful friends with different beliefs and ideas),

 and I'm so grateful that I do now. 

Lately I have had spring fever.... 

I've been feeling rather lazy. I don't want to do homework - or anything productive really. I just want to go to track practice. And enjoy the weather. Case in point: I went through a box of cereal in two days. Purely because I didn't want to cook anything. 

Lately I have been questioning my plans for next year... 

but you always question big decisions. 

Lately I have been anxious/nervous/excited for track championships!!!!

NWAACCS is less than a week away.

I have a busy schedule - I'll be racing the 10k, the 1500m, 

and the 5k in a period of two days. 

I'm really hoping for a gold medal, but I'm going to enjoy the races. 

Love to race. Love to win. Love to run :) 

Unripe Fruit

Have you ever bitten into a strawberry (or any kind of fruit for that matter) 

that wasn't quite ripe yet? 

I LOVE strawberries, 

and I am ecstatic about them almost being in season again.

But there is nothing worse than buying strawberries 

and having to wait to eat them! 

There have been quite a few times that I lacked patience, and, instead of waiting until my strawberries were perfectly ripe, I ate them as they were - 

a little green and everything. 

And you know what? They tasted terrible. Not nearly as good as normal strawberries. In fact, I didn't like them very much at all. 

...................................................................................................................................................................

Lately, I have sort of felt like a failure. 

I'm not looking for sympathy - or even being down on myself - 

I'm just making a point. 

I have worked really hard this year at a lot of things, and I have always been of the mentality that "you reap what you sew".  So, naturally, I have expected that my hard work would lead to success. 

This has not always been the case, however. I have been sewing and sewing and sewing in various areas of my life, and I have yet to reap the benefits I desired. 

I have been working hard, 

and that hard work has not quite come to fruition yet.... 

As a result, I found myself asking God the other day "What is the point of all my hard work if it's not bearing any fruit? 

Why am I investing myself into all these things to no avail?" 

I feel like God wants me to pour into all the relationships he has placed in my life and work hard at all of the tasks I have been given (track, school, government), but it is sometimes discouraging when I don't see any fruit. 

But I came across this verse this morning when I was reading the Bible. 

Isaiah 49:4 

I replied "But my work seems so useless! I have spent my strength for nothing and to no purpose. Yet I leave it all in the Lord's hand; I will trust God for my reward."

Here, Isaiah was struggling with the exact thing I have been struggling with.

 But he clearly recognized that, despite the evidence,

 he was to trust God and God alone for his reward.

...................................................................................................................................................................

I have to do the same thing. 

Instead of biting into fruit that is unripe, 

I need to be patient and trust God to bear fruit in my life. 

After all, it is not in my own strength that I accomplish anything - 

it is through his strength (Philippians 4:13). 

I'm sure those strawberries will taste a whole lot better 

if I wait for them to ripen!!!

So Long Spring Break!

I flew north for Spring break, and, 

though the weather was better than expected, 

I am thrilled to return to Boise’s springtime temperatures.

74 degrees today – right in time for Easter. I love spring!

I have had a lovely Spring Break – 

it was not the most restful, by any means, but definitely good. 

I love Northern Idaho. I love running along pine tree lined roads and the glistening rivers. I love my grandma and her charming little garden house. And I love catching up with people I went to elementary school with. It’s a little strange, but amazing.

I’ll spare you all of the details, 

but I thought that I would give some highlights of my trip:

Getting to hold my friend Amanda’s baby. We danced ballet together when we were little kids and had sleepovers and talked about boys.

 Now, she is married and has a daughter. Life blows by.

Lunch with my grandma and my friend Cheyenne in a resort hotel overlooking a beautiful lake. And a gourmet ice cream sundae for dessert. Followed by window shopping downtown.

And moose sightings. 

A successful 24 x 400 meter workout, that I genuinely had nightmares about the night before. I did it alone, and did 4 more than I was supposed to. 

I’d say I conquered it.

Exploring the tastes and restaurants of downtown Spokane – The most delicious Bison burger in a trendy pub and French cuisine in an adorable café.

And.... Getting my first manicure ever. I’m all about experiences!

Now, it’s time for a new adventure. Tomorrow, I begin my last quarter at TVCC. It will likely rush by like a whirlwind… I’ll be traveling every weekend for track, tying up loose ends in student government, and getting things ready for next year. 

But I want to enjoy the moment. 

Make it last as long as possible.

Hello Spring Break!

I’m all about embracing new life experiences.

About things I can write about in my journal.

And things that spice life up a little.

In Paris, I once spit off of the Eiffel Tower.

Now you know.

So, for Spring Break, I got inspired to take a Greyhound bus to my old stomping grounds near Spokane, Washington. I’ve never taken a Greyhound anywhere, but so far I think I would recommend it.

The tickets are cheap.

The bus driver is friendly.

It’s reminiscent of all the public transportation I took in Europe.

And the people make for excellent entertainment.

So many different people from so many different backgrounds - I can’t stop my curiosity from running rampant. 

Spokane, apparently, has not gotten the memo that it is SPRING Break. Apparently, it’s a stifling 28 degrees there.

This is going to make for a few not-so-wonderful long runs and track workouts. But Kelly says that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger… 

so I’ll take her word for it.

In Boise, it's all sunshine and roses. 

We celebrated the beginning of Spring Break by taking pictures for instagram, naturally. 

But not in Spokane. It's a little chillier there. 

And, did I mention that my parents are in California right now? 

Or that my little sister is going to Hawaii in a few days?

Thus is my life. To be fair, I had to opportunity to go to California, but for some reason I turned it down.

I have a feeling a grand adventure is awaiting me up North… in the snow.

And the first few days of break have been lovely so far, so I'm excited to see what else is in store. 

There is really no reason for me to include this picture in this post,

 except that I love it. 

And I love Spring Break!!! 

Runner's High and Spring Break!

At 10:13 a.m. on Wednesday morning, I officially began my Spring Break.

Though I finished up all of my finals and student government business on Tuesday, Wednesday’s workout was supposed to be a grueling 

20 x 400 meter repeats. 

And I could not possibly get myself into spring break 

mode until that was completed.

Up until Wednesday, I had only ever done 16 x 400 meters, 

so having to do 20 was somewhat daunting. 

It’s not like four more laps is that bad. Physically, I’m fairly confident that I could probably do eight more laps… or even more…. And maintain my pace.

But mentally, in a workout that already takes forever, in the rain, when you are exhausted…. 20 x 400 meters at lower than 10k race pace seems a little…. intimidating.

And on top of that, it’s been a rough week of workouts. We are all really exhausted. Maybe it’s the two-a-days we have been throwing into our routine, but it had been a rough few days of practice.

So I met my friend Annie at the track bright and early, and we began to bust out this classic 10k workout. Being finals week, my coach gave us a go ahead to practice on our own, so it was just us and the track. 

And the 10 mph wind on the backstretch.

I’ll spare the minute details, but I will talk about the last mile. 

We had four laps to go. 

We had only ever done 16 laps of repeats, and we were tired.

“We finished the main part of the workout. 

These four laps are the just the toppings on the sundae”, I said.

And we began to count down.

Lap number 17. The chocolate sauce.

Lap number 18. The whipped cream.

Lap number 19. The sprinkles.

And lap number 20… the cherry.

As I’m sure you can imagine, the end of a grueling workout is not the prime time to be thinking about whipped cream and chocolate sauce. But while it made us a little nauseous, it also spurred us on.

And then, after a cooldown and a major case of runner’s high… 

it was officially spring break.

We were pretty thrilled that we finished. Big smiles :) 

Linfield Ice Breaker 10k Recap

It's been quite the weekend. 

I probably experienced every single emotion I was capable of experiencing twice over. And there is no way I can debrief you all on everything - and you probably don't want all the details, anyway :)

 So I'll do my best to do a short recap.

Friday afternoon, after eight hours on a charter bus, my team arrived in McMinnville, Oregon for the Linfield Ice Breaker. 

We hung out at the hotel for an hour or so and then headed over to the track for a 10k under the stadium lights. Running at night is absolutely exhilarating. 

Pre-race nerves. Crazy faces, crazy emotions. 

We were scheduled to race at 7 pm. 

Three of my teammates competed with me against a group of 22 girls total. 

The weather was perfectly mild, but I opted to wear running tights instead of spandex. I prefer to be almost a little warm when I run. Needless to say, only 2 of the 22 girls were wearing under armour. I didn't care. It felt perfect. 

We toed the line, and I felt unusually calm and excited. The gun went off. 

And we began the first of 25 laps. My teammates who were not running the race were spread out in the in-field cheering us on. My coach yelled my lap splits to me each lap. For me, racing wise, there is nothing more exciting than being able to hit the exact same lap split 10 times in a row. I love pacing. 

This race felt pretty much like a tempo to me. I was mostly by myself (unless I was lapping people... this happens a lot in distance races on the track), because the leader was way faster than me and the other girls not as fast. I stayed in 2nd place the whole race and basically coasted at 6:02 minute/mile pace (give or take a few seconds) for 6 miles. 

Mile 4 was definitely the most difficult. But once I made it to the last two miles, time flew. Before I knew it, I was on my last lap, and I managed to kick- a solid 10 seconds faster than the laps I had been running. 

All in all, I was pretty satisfied with my race. I was 9 seconds slower than my PR, but in a race as long as a 10k, 9 seconds is really just a technicality. And I feel like I could go much faster if I had people to pull me along. It's early yet. I have high hopes for that race. So I got 2nd out of 22. The girl who got first place broke 36!!! She was crazy. 38:10 was my time. My goal for the season is to break 37. I think it's doable.

Mostly, I just genuinely enjoy the 10k. For awhile I was beginning to dislike running - the same thing happened to me last year in the winter. And some aspects of running are not fun. But the 10k is fun. You feel so accomplished after!!!

After our race - Exhausted and freezing but incredibly happy!

We tried to cool down, but it was a mess. I had crazy runner's high (I usually do) and was zig zagging and sprinting all over the infield.  Another girl could barely jog. We eventually stopped and stretched and sipped on coconut water while we watched the boys race. 

My friend Annie (far left in the picture) was speaking with a coach from a different school, and after he complimented her on her race he said "Susanna did really well, too. I'm actually surprised she did so well... wearing tights!" 

Apparently wearing running tights instead of spandex when I'm racing makes me look like I'm not serious. 

Believe me, I'm serious :) 

My friend Tyler was a champ and cheered me on the whole time!


All the other events were on Saturday, so the next day I got to watch my team compete without having to worry about racing myself. That felt amazing. My race was over. I could eat whenever, not be nervous, and enjoy the day. The other 10kers and I ran about 10 miles easy in the morning, too. Needless to say my body is pretty tired!!!

All in all it was a pretty amazing weekend. There were tons of good conversations, many great memories made, and it made me hungry for more. I feel so grateful and blessed. 

Skipalongs

My great grandmother Mommy Kay (as she was affectionately called by my mother and grandmother) used to have a little notebook in which she would write her thoughts throughout the day. She called this book her "skipalong" book, and it accompanied her everywhere she went (or so I'm told). The lovely thing about a skipalong book is that there does not have to be order, rhyme, or reason to the thoughts it contains. Simple, random thoughts. 

I feel like writing some skipalongs tonight. 

1. My first race of the outdoor track season is only eight days away - a 10k. I'm excited because I love the 10k... but then again, I have only run it twice. It's a monster of a race. It requires loads of mental preparation and concentration. I will likely not be able to feel my legs for the second half of the race. But I love the feeling of running a consistent pace, lap after lap. 

I love feeling like I can hold the same pace for so long. 

This was at my first ever 10k last year.

I'm nervous, too. There is a lot of pressure to perform as well as I did last year, and I have no idea where I'm at compared to then. We have been running a lot of 10 x 600 meter repeats and 16 x 200s, but almost no 400 meter repeats like we did last year. I guess I just have to believe in my coach, believe in my training, and believe in myself. 

2. I'm beyond stoked for tomorrow night. My church is putting on a huge event called Compel. They rented out the Egyptian theater in downtown Boise, flew out a guest speaker from New York, and invited every college age student in the Treasure Valley. I'm driving a few of my friends out to Boise after practice. Could not be more excited!!!

3. The decision about where I'm going to transfer next year has not gotten any easier to make. I'm still overwhelmed and still praying for answers. Letters of intent are beginning to float my way... and they have expiration dates. I know that I am SO BLESSED to be given such wonderful opportunities, and I am grateful that I get to choose. But I need help choosing. A lot of help. 

4. Right now in my sociology class we are studying religion. My two favorite subjects combined. I literally am geeking out about it. I have been telling everyone I know all of the interesting things I am learning, and I just had the best time writing a five page paper on whether or not I believe religion is functional for society. Sometimes, college is fantastic. 

That's all for now, folks. 

Faites de beaux rêves!!!

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off To Portland I Go!

This has been one busy week, but mostly just because I have been scrambling to get ready for this conference! 

A week before my birthday, my mom asked me what I wanted. I told her I wanted to go to a church conference... although I had NO idea which one or how that would even be possible. 

A few days later, a girl I only kind of know from my church text me and told me that she had a group going to Generation Unleashed, and one of the girls going backed out... but the spot was already paid for!!!!

I honestly figured that I would not be able to go. Not only do I have practice, class, and tons of homework to deal with, but I had begun planning a government 

retreat the same weekend of the conference. 

I decided I would see if it worked out. Not force anything, but still try. And... 

I cannot even begin to explain how PERFECTLY everything worked out to go to this conference. There happens to be nothing going on in class the day I will miss. I was able to move the government retreat I was planning (being president has its perks) and everybody actually liked the new date better. My coach was TOTALLY okay with me missing practice 

because he just happens to be out of town for work this week so we are sort of practicing on our own anyway. 

WOW. Happy Birthday to me :) 

So tomorrow I'm leaving at 5 a.m. for three days of worship, 

the Word, friends, and no sleep. 

I'll still have to get my runs/workouts in, so I'll be making use of the hotel treadmill very early in the mornings. 

I'll just survive on coffee and the presence of Jesus!!! 

So that's why this week has been incredibly busy. I have done hours of online homework and spent tons of time in meetings and doing errands and trying to get my life together. But its all worth it!

I'll be back on Monday with details! Hope you all have a lovely weekend!

Reasons I'm Thankful

I have so much to be thankful for today. 

I feel overwhelmed and blessed. 

And I need to pour my heart out. 

So here goes a long post.  

Things I feel thankful for today: 

1. I made it through an entire running work out (12x 200s) without any pain in my achilles. After a month of cross training, this is such a good feeling. 

2. Thus far, winter term is going SO well. I think I like my classes. I love the girls I live with. I have made so many new friends and am having a blast talking to people. I have gotten into conversations with at least thirty strangers in the last few days. I love it. 

3. I have gotten to start every morning reading the Bible and just chilling in the presence of God. And it's made all the difference. 

4. I have SUCH a good student government team. As president, I have a lot on my shoulders, and I'm honestly not cut out for the job. Though everything is working out, and I definitely filled a position that needed to be filled (someone was needed that could speak well at board meetings and could mend relationships with the Administration, and I like that kind of thing).... But I still get insecure about being in the position. Luckily, I have killer teammates who do hard work and get me by. We just spent a couple hours at Denny's hashing out ways to make our campus better. So great. 

5. I have a great coach. He has been so understanding of my injury. So helpful in helping me gain strength and be the best I can be. And today he pleasantly surprised me because.....

6. I get to go to Reno this weekend with my dad!!! He is going there to preach at a church, and I really wanted to go. But I would have to miss Monday's practice. I asked my coach very nicely, and he said "You NEED to go. You won't get that many opportunities to do something like that with your dad." I was so happy. He knows I would give my right arm for the sport, and the fact that he is relaxed in the off season helps me relax. 

7. I have learned so much this year about life. About balance. About taking care of myself. About what's important. Today, in my workout, I could have been stressed because I'm not speed oriented and therefore don't compare well to some of the other 200 girls... but I let it go. I just did my best. I could have worked out for hours in the weight room after until my body was exhausted. But instead I dead lifted, did some planks, rolled out my muscles, and felt great. I could have come home and gotten too busy to eat more than a protein drink and a banana, but instead I made sure I had that plus tons of other food. I could have spent all day thinking about my workout, but instead I thought about God and I hung out with friends and I focused on government and school and how beautiful life was. Balance. 

8. Everything I have learned has not only helped me, but I'm able to pour into girls who are younger than me that are struggling with some of the things I have struggled with. 

And I love being a mentor in that way.  

9. I have been given so many wonderful compliments lately, and I don't deserve them. But I definitely appreciate it more than the people who compliment me know. This morning, a very nice girl sent me a very encouraging text, and it made my whole day. 

I could go on and on, but I'll stop there. 

Life is so wonderful, and even though I know that this term will bring difficulties and sorrows along with the victories, I want to always remain thankful. 

Because I really am beyond blessed.