Noel, Noel...

How on earth is it already Christmas? 

Somehow - in the midst of ten-page APA research papers, finals week, and freezing cold temperatures, and my first indoor track meet -
Christmas kind of snuck up on me. 

And while I am usually obsessed with all things Christmas,

 I have felt more reflective than festive the last few days. 

I have been reminiscing on this time last year. I was so very different. My goals, my understanding of the world, my fears, my concerns.... they all feel so distant. I almost feel like that person wasn't me. 

Like she is just some character from a novel that I once read. 

It is a strange sensation, and it is one that I have often felt as I have grown and changed over the years. Three years ago at this time I was a lonely American girl wandering around Europe. 

That seems like a dream. Did that even happen?

And I have been contemplating the future. I have so many big dreams that do not in any way resemble a normal life. I have big fears, too. Fears of settling. Fears of failing. Fears of getting stuck in piles on school debt and having to work a 9-5 job that I hate and of not being happy. But mostly I am not afraid. Mostly I am excited and curious as to how my life is going to unfold. 

I want to know what is waiting around the corner. 

So all of these thoughts have been swirling around in my mind, and I suppose it is because I finally have time to think thoughts that don't have to do with Organizational Communication or Inferential Statistics. Christmas break is a great time to reflect and to re-assess and to contemplate. 

But it is also a time for celebration.

For Christmas parties. 

For catching up on good books. 

And for spending time with lovely friends. 

And of course - Christmas break is a time for running. Even in the snow and cold. I will be training hard this break. Running everyday, lifting every other day, and swimming two or three days a week. Indoor season is short and fast. And I don't want to miss out on any opportunities because of a lack of preparation. I am so grateful that I am healthy and able to run, as well, because last year at this time I was dealing with a nasty achilles injury that put me out for over a month.

................

Anyway, to get Christmas break started right and to get into the Christmas spirit, my sister and I did some Christmas shopping today (its about time I got on that) and did some holiday baking tonight. And it was lovely. [I am aware how silly it is to parallel Christmas spirit with consumerism and sugary treats, but that is another topic for another blogpost.]
For now, I will just say goodnight :)