Friday, November 15, 2013

En Fin


So cross country is over. 

Done. 
Finished. 
En fin. 


And I don't really want to talk about how it ended, honestly, because I have been trying my best not to over-analyze every single thing in my life. 
(So difficult for me). 

And without going into detail, this season has been much different than what I expected. I didn't meet any of my goals... and, though I do feel like I progressed from last year, I am still not the runner that I used to be. I am still struggling so much mentally. And I still am a great runner and a terrible racer. So regionals was the same, old, disappointing story. 

I have spent this week taking a break from running. I am a huge believer that this is necessary after each  and every season. Running is such a mental sport, for one. And I need so badly to mentally reset. I throw myself heavily into my competitive seasons. I am one of those people who won't eat sugar for months and who will fall asleep thinking about my races. 
So the other night I ate a giant no-bake cookie for dinner and stayed up a little later than normal... just to say I could. 

But also, since I am a year-round athlete (the only season I don't compete is summer, and even then I'm training for xc),
  I know my body needs to recuperate and repair itself. 

So I have only run once this week (with a friend, so it was nothing major) and swam one day for fun. The rest of the week I have been lazy as ever. 

I have gotten less sleep than normal, I haven't been chugging water every other minute, and I have been throwing myself into homework in the hopes that I could actually be productive. 

Who am I kidding though? Instead of using the three to four hours each day that I would have spent at practice, I have done other fun things.
 Like going with friends on random excursions to World Market to buy exotic types of dark chocolate.

 And going to the club to sit in a steam room and completely relax. 

And getting buy one get one free Starbucks Christmas drinks (have you had a gingerbread latte? Spiced whip-cream and molasses drizzle... 
it will change your life). 

It has been a nice break, for sure, but I'm ready to get back into the swing of things. I haven't been taking care of myself, and I miss the routine and release of running. Not only that, but I'm still frustrated about this season and I'm ready to unleash in Indoor track. I have never competed in a true indoor season before (my old school didn't have an indoor season) so this will be new to me. 

I want to end this post by stating that I truly am grateful for this past cross country season, even if I am discouraged because of it. While I didn't perform up to my expectations, I am so blessed to be apart of my team. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful coaching staff and athletic department. Coming in as a transfer student, I could have easily run into tons of issues. Many of my friends who transferred to other schools and athletic programs did. But I feel like I mesh so well here, and I was completely accepted as a leader, a friend, and a teammate from the moment I arrived. 


So I'm going to enjoy the rest of this week and weekend, and then I'm ready to reset and get moving again. I still have a year and a half as a collegiate runner, and I'm going to make the most of it!


Also, thanks to my sweet grandmother and awesome cousin Danika who came out to support me in the freezing cold! 
It was such a wonderful thing to have them there cheering for me :) 

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